The Trauma No One Talks About

What I See in Survivors of Narcissistic Abuse

Over the years of working with beautiful, sensitive souls in my healing practice, I’ve noticed a painful and often overlooked truth:

So many of the people who walk into my space are not just healing from a relationship—they’re recovering from the deep, invisible trauma left by narcissistic abuse.

It’s not always obvious at first. Some arrive smiling, others in tears, and many unsure of why they feel so disconnected from themselves. But as we begin to peel back the layers, a common thread emerges is they gave their heart, their energy, their soul to someone who carefully dismantled their self-worth, all while wearing the mask of love.

Something I know firsthand. An experience I have walked through more than once in this lifetime.

And yet, in the broader world of self-help, relationships, and even spiritual development, we tend to focus so much on understanding the narcissist—their behaviour, their patterns, their childhood wounds—that we forget to focus on the experiences, the emotions, the healing of the ones who are left behind in the aftermath.

But what’s missing in these conversations is the voice of the survivor—the empath, the intuitive, the lightworker—whose energy was drained, whose self-trust was shattered, and whose spirit was dimmed by the emotional manipulation they endured.

And let me be very clear:

This is trauma.

It’s real. It’s deep. And it’s often silent.

What I See in My Healing Clients

Narcissistic abuse is subtle, cunning, and often leaves no visible scars. But in session, its impact shows up like a whisper through the soul:

• A gifted intuitive who no longer trusts her own inner knowing because she was gaslighted into doubting her every feeling.
• A gentle man who tenses at any offer of love, fearing that behind the kindness is a hook, a trap, a debt to be paid.
• A radiant, heart-centred soul who apologizes for speaking up, convinced they are “too much” or “not enough.”
• An empath who struggles to say “no” because they were punished, shamed, or abandoned every time they tried to have a boundary.

This kind of trauma is not always easy to name. Clients will say things like, “It wasn’t that bad,” or “They didn’t hit me,” or “Maybe I was just too sensitive.”

No. You were not too sensitive.
You were attuned. You felt what was happening.
You knew on a soul level that something was off—even when it was denied, minimized, or twisted back onto you.

And that knowing was your power.

Why Narcissistic Abuse Hits Empaths So Hard

If you are empathic, intuitive, or spiritually awake, you probably always want to see the good in people. You give love freely. You listen deeply. You believe in healing, growth, and second chances. This is your superpower—but it can also be your vulnerability.

Narcissists are often drawn to this light. Not because they honour it, but because they feed off of it.

They sense your compassion.
They see your willingness to understand.
They know you will blame yourself before blaming them.

So, they mirror your dreams, reflect your wounds, and slowly entangle themselves into your nervous system. What starts as charm often morphs into controlling behaviour and language. Love becomes a tool of manipulation. And little by little, you begin to disappear.

Until one day, you wake up and realize you don’t recognize yourself anymore.

Spiritual Gaslighting: A Hidden Layer of the Wound

In spiritual circles, this pain can be even more complex.

You may have been told to “focus on the lesson,” or “rise above your ego,” or “see the divine in the other.” And while these teachings have their place, they can be dangerous when used to excuse abuse or bypass accountability.

True healing doesn’t happen by spiritually minimizing your experience.

It happens when you face the truth:
You were harmed.
You were manipulated.
You were made to feel small so someone else could feel powerful.

To the Spiritual Empaths Who Are Still Healing

If any of this resonates with you, I want you to hear this with every fibre of your being:

You are not broken.
You are not “too sensitive.”
You are not overreacting.

You’re healing from a relationship that slowly disconnected you from your own light. But that light was never lost—it was only buried under layers of confusion, self-doubt, and survival.

And it is coming back.
Moment by moment.
Choice by choice.
Breath by breath.

Healing is not always dramatic. Often, it looks like choosing to believe yourself again. Reclaiming your voice. Letting “no” be a sacred word. Holding yourself through triggers with compassion. Rebuilding trust with your own intuition. Surrounding yourself with people who see you, support you, and don’t ask you to shrink.

What Healing Looks Like in the Sacred Space We Share

In the healing sessions I offer, I witness this reclamation process all the time.

I’ve watched clients remember who they are beneath the stories they were told.
I’ve seen them cry not just from pain—but from the relief of finally feeling seen.
I’ve held space as they returned to their body, their truth, their own energy field.

And I want you to know: this is possible for you, too.

It’s not always easy, and it’s not always fast—but it’s sacred work. And you don’t have to do it alone.

It’s time to stop centring the narcissist and start centring the survivor.
To validate the pain that doesn’t always have language.
To witness the strength it takes to leave, to heal, and to rise.

Because you are not just surviving.
You are remembering.
You are reawakening.
You are reclaiming your soul.

And that, beautiful soul, is the greatest gift from all of this you have walked through, the most powerful transformation of all. Click here if you would love to work with me and get back to being your sacred self.

You are loved and you are blessed, always x

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